The Hypocrisy of Applauding the Baltimore Mom While Condemning the Protesters
2015/04/30 –Ā She Matters:Ā Toya Graham was scared and desperate to save her son from the melee. The same can be said about the people in the streets of Baltimore, who are doing everything they can to save themselves.
Even before Toya Graham, the Baltimore mother of six who was captured on video ādiscipliningā her son, began making the news rounds, she was already being hailed as a hero.
The video of her dragging her 16-year-old son, Michael, who was throwing rocks at police, from Baltimoreās melee and slapping him repeatedly in the face had gone viral. Commenters e-applauded her for ādoing what any good mother would do.ā Some called her āmother of the year.ā
Iām part of the contingent that doesnāt think Graham was right. I was a kid who got hit, and Iām in the camp that striking another personāespecially a childāin anything other than self-defense is wrong.Countless studiesĀ have concluded that hitting your children doesnāt make them better, responsible people. After seeing Grahamās reactionāadmittedly one born out of anger and fearāIām not surprised that her son has a similar reaction to anger and fear: violence. The lessons you get at home are the habits you take āabroad.ā
I absolutely donāt think that she handled it the best way, but I think it was the best wayĀ she knew how in the moment. While I have the luxury of sitting at my laptop debating the moral quandary of it all a few days later, Graham didnāt have that same luxury when she spotted her son in a crowd of protesters. She wasnāt thinking philosophically or about what bystanders would say or whether there were cameras rolling or whether her actions would soon be viewed by an audience watching on their cellphones.
She was reacting as she thought about her son getting himself killed by police out in the streets of Baltimore. SheĀ told CBS News, āI didnāt want him to be a Freddie Gray,ā referring to the 25-year-old man who died after he was seriously injured under suspicious circumstances while in police custody. Grahamās fear for her son if he was anywhere near the police, much less antagonizing them, has merit.
GrahamĀ was scared and she was admittedly angry. Her only son was putting himself in harmās way, and undoubtedly she was desperate to protect him. Graham, as she describes it, ālost it.ā I wonāt condemn Grahamās reaction.
But I will point out the hypocrisy of people who applaud Graham and yet condemn Baltimoreās protesters, who have been called āthugsā and āanimalsā and everything but a child of God, when their reactions and Grahamās are one and the same.
Just like Graham, the people in the streets of Baltimore are also scared and fearful and desperate. Graham is using all her might to ādisciplineā her child, who is taller and, likely, physically stronger than she is. There are citizens throwing rocks at police officers with guns. These are means of last resort because they have all ālost it.ā
Itās not a huge leap of logic to see that Grahamās anger and fearāalong with the resulting violenceāand the protestersā anger and fearāand resulting violenceācome from the same place. AndĀ if you can find the empathy to cheer for Grahamās methods of saving her son, also find some sympathy for the people of Baltimore who are trying to save themselves.
Source: The Root MagazineĀ